"The only excuse for missing work is death in the family...

...and then only if it's your own"

So Mike's wife went into labor something like 4 in the morning yesterday. At least twice during the day I was asked when he would be back to work by the higher-ups. This, despite the fact that I had already told them I didn't know, and that I was just working under the assumption that he probably wouldn't be in the rest of the week. (A) It's unreasonable because there is no doubt in my mind that the only acceptable answer is "Why, right after lunch, of course," (B) it's not my day to babysit him - he calls in and tells you or you call him and ask, either way, asking me is the poor manager's way of babying out of having to do work.

So anyway, she was in labor all day yesterday and finally gave birth at 11:11 PM last night. And the first question asked of me in the morning? "When do you expect Mike to be back?" Not today, jagoff...you may never have had a child, but 20 hours of labor followed by a night of 40 minute naps on a hospital recliner does not leave a man in a state where he's going to be worth anything at work, so just let it go. He'll call when he can form words without drooling pools onto his shoes.