Why does it always come back to this?

So, I'm loving the new job. It remains perfect. Well, almost perfect. See, I now work in a smallish room with three women. "Three women?" you ask, "oh, I feel so sorry for you Mat![/sarcasm]" Yeah, that's not the bad part. See, because the room is smallish, and because I'm not looking to leave the wrong impression on these people who have known me for three weeks, I'm guarding myself a lot more closely in terms of, shall we say, "bleeding the pressure from the lower plumbing." Not that I'm the type to gas the office on a regular basis, but when the system's on high alert and you couple it with "new guy nerves," It can lead to some significant build-up.

So the other day, I let the pressure build for a while, and then went for an afternoon walk to the lunchroom for a cup of water and a little of the old "vent-and-drag" maneuver (see also, " cropdusting"). Now, keep in mind, this trek involves a short trip through the warehouse, which would be the perfect place to dissipate extraneous gas. But, did I do that? No, I waited until I got to the lunchroom - a much smaller, enclosed space - and "depressurized" while thumbing the button for the water-cooler. No big deal, it was the afternoon after all, so it's not like the place was due for much business. So, I finished both and headed for the door. I flipped the light switch and closed the door behind me, and as I turned for the steps, my eyes went wide with horror and I blushed as I saw someone else coming up the steps to the kitchen. I probably could have tried to delay her with idle talk, I probably could have faked a heart attack and fallen down the metal stairs, but I'm pretty sure my shocked look and blush had already condemned me anyway, so I just smiled as I passed her on the steps and left her to walk into the methane incubator.

Oh well. People had to find out sometime I guess.